SMEAGOL IS FREE!!

(Psycho Happy Dance)

Plus, a bonus cartoon certain to be appreciated by the Visiting Artilleryman.

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18 Comments

  1. Mike

     /  December 15, 2007

    That is a Blair moment if there ever was one.

    Reply
  2. Ho-ee-oh, subvert, the paradigm…

    Reply
  3. blackpine

     /  December 17, 2007

    All I’m saying is that nobody uses the abilities intelligently…

    Reply
  4. Mike

     /  December 17, 2007

    No, no, no, no.

    Blackpine, you are a dirty bastard when it comes to gaming and you LIKE it.

    So stop trying to sound like you are a deep thinker and embrace your inner evil.

    Reply
  5. blackpine

     /  December 18, 2007

    You are right, as I am not a deep thinker. Simple is good. There is no dirty or clean. There is no good or bad. That is overly complicating things. There is simply the task of solving your enemies. Ideally your solutions should be fast, elegant and permanent. There are also ways to solve people that allow you to remain enigmatic, and give you advantages for solving other people in the future. You got problems? We have solutions.

    Reply
  6. Mike

     /  December 18, 2007

    Brought to you by the same people who brought you Prophicy Insurance. Have a “Promised One” problem, or a “Weapon of Eternal Light” headed your way? Come talk to us for a free consultation and we can get that problem solved.

    Reply
  7. Alex

     /  December 18, 2007

    Gods above I miss those days.
    And I’m much wiser now – I think I would have equally creative solutions to Comrade Blair’s “simple” solutions.
    Simple my ass – I really had to scramble as DM and I think sometimes I had to admit, gracelessly, defeat.
    Andy – you were and still are ahead of your time in more ways than you care to admit.

    Reply
  8. Anna

     /  December 18, 2007

    Mike, my inner paladin just shuddered for a minute contemplating that…:-)

    Reply
  9. Sounds like free eyeballs to MEEEEE….

    Reply
  10. Maddie thinks Blair shows a striking resemblance to Black Mage(TM).

    🙂

    Reply
  11. Mike

     /  December 18, 2007

    Maddie, Anna, you cannot begin to understand the reality that is Blair in a gaming situation. I had to do more research into Chemistry to stop Blair due to things like medievil people not understanding the math or chemistry behind fuel-air explosions and and refining ability for metals and chemicals. Blair was a Black Mage who had every scheme work brilliantly, or close enough that it made no difference.

    And I have to agree with his mentality on “prophecy insurance”. Come on people, how many times have the good guys won because they were the good guys? Blair fixed that in so many ways it was awesome to behold. My personal favorite was by launching financial reforms so that the country, even though ruled by a evil dick, had a huge middle-class and lots of prosperity. The promised one shows up and can’t get a revolution going becuase everyone likes the status quo.

    Wile E. Coyote, Genius.

    Reply
  12. blackpine

     /  December 18, 2007

    Well, in my defense, I hated bad guys who had kingdoms, technology and wealth while betraying not one trait to explain how they got all their cool toys. Prime example, the Drow. “We have a giant underground city with technology, art and culture that is one generation ahead of anything you have ever seen. Our means of social discourse? Duels to the death and a cannibalistic matriarchy!” Whence art with no artisans? Whence wealth without merchants?

    My answer? A few tons of powdered coal and a manufactured mine fire. Wait a month for it burn itself out and then mine the molten remains for ore.

    Or, Star Wars. An economy that can build a moon sized weapon and an army of cloned soldiers for military ubiquity. Their constitution? An Empire. The only thing generally more retarded than sci-fi or fantasy political science is their sexual politics. Look no further than the crypto-bondage of The Dragon Reborn. WE revisit the cruel-but-magical vagina cliche from the Drow with the magic users being over-controlling women who kill any man with equal power. The men are busy trying to remove the ‘taint from their “Power,” while another army enters the scene with non magic using female officers who use their own magic using women as attack dogs by putting them on magic leashes that show you whose boss.

    Blargh.

    Give me a soulless industrialist with an army of robots any day. Give me a nihilistic martial artist who punches people in the face because he likes the sound it makes. I want to wreck everything in those worlds because they are so dumb and so universal. Then I want to do it right.

    Reply
  13. blackpine

     /  December 18, 2007

    Also, in response to Alex, the prosperity was more multi-layered than that. I turned a castle into a clearing house for grains and goods, as well as providing banking and market projections to the surrounding farms to allow them to plant crops intelligently for the next season vs. the standard fantasy stock of simply being a Paladin’s bitchin’ crib. I also invited the mob in on the sly, and allowed private ownership of the land grants given to me with the castle. Then I had a year round army of professionals recruited from refugees globally. They were picked because it was the dual thrust of looking noble while hand picking a pool of recruits who would have a higher standard of dedication. So, if invaded, the merchants would fight for order, the farmers for the land they owned, the continuously trained soldiers fight for pay, the criminals fight for their handsome skim, my neighbors fight because we are continuously economically critical, and the refugees fight for their final home and benefactor. And while the situation ran itself, it left me free to work as an assassin. As a ficitive kingdom, that beats most fantasy genre’s that I’ve read.

    Reply
  14. Alex

     /  December 19, 2007

    Hence my comment – your ideas were complex, well-executed, and were a “defense-in-depth” that was just about impossible to breach as a DM trying to hold his campaign ideas together and come up with attempted rebuttals to the schemes. Despite my struggles with it – it was a wonderful mental exercise and I miss it greatly.
    Someday…someday – I hope to be able to revisit those days and give you a challenge that you will enjoy, and, may even stump you. Assuming I could do such a thing that is.
    But as a teaser – I haven’t stopped with new and fun ideas for The False One and Embers to foil the Fabulous Betzer Boys(TM) one more time.

    Reply
  15. Make the dude run for city council once he gets back stateside.

    That kind of a mind is born for politics.

    Reply
  16. Mike

     /  December 20, 2007

    Speaking of which Blackpine, we ARE going to finish the Night of the Blood Moon. You built it, you WILL fight for it, and I will try and wreck it.

    Reply
  17. blackpine

     /  December 20, 2007

    I won’t fight for an inch of it. I’ll kill for all of it.

    Reply

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