Prey item calls experts, salutes predator

So, let me get this straight:

  1. Woman has garden.
  2. Giant cat capable of bounding directly onto rooftops goes into garden.
  3. Woman wants giant cat to "live free in its own habitat."

There's only one cure for a nimrod like this.  Guess what, lady?  Your yard is now this giant cat's habitat!  Got kids?  Grandkids?  Pets?  Guess what, lady? 

Large predators don't give a shit what you think, and even less of one for your cutesy, prey-item view of a world where nothing ever gets hurt worse than can be handled with a band-aid and some Bactine.  THEY THINK it'd be nice to lazily scrape the flesh off your femur with their sandpaper tongues.

This giant cat isn't going to break into a rousing rendition of Hakuna Matata with your kid:  it's going to jump on that little kid and snap her neck like a twig.  Or else, if your granddaughter's lucky, she's going to get to struggle feebly while Kitty Boo clamps down on her windpipe prior to carrying her away to some dark corner to be Kid Julienne.

Sometimes I think "bring on the Apocalypse.  At least it'll clear out the morons."

Leave a comment

2 Comments

  1. Maybe next trip west she’ll pet a grizzly cub?

    Reply
  2. One can only hope…

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

  • Featured Eyeballs

  • What’s today again?

    June 2006
    M T W T F S S
    « May   Jul »
     1234
    567891011
    12131415161718
    19202122232425
    2627282930  
  • Archives

  • Blog Stats

    • 125,249 hits
  • Recent Comments

    www.ebisawa-ss.com on New Link: Time Highway
    0jr on Batshit-Crazy in Budapest
    0jr on Batshit-Crazy in Budapest
    Yet More Infantilizi… on Everything you know is….…
    Yet More Infantilizi… on Dread for the Future: is it Cl…
  • Follow

    Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

    Join 220 other followers

    %d bloggers like this: